Too Many Mothef***in' Ants!

So before I head up to the NBA Draft to harass a bunch of young athletes on the biggest night of their lives I thought I might share a couple things with you. I know that I've somehow managed to bring my post frequency down to one (sometimes two!) a month, but I assure that there probably is a reason for that, though I can't really think of one. Since I'm going to the Draft tonight, I guess you could expect a post about that, but at this point, who knows?

ONE: Steve Zahn (of Saving Silverman and, ah, Sahara? fame) was on Conan last week talking about his farm and about how he has some goats. But these aren't just your normal goats or else why would I mention it? These goats are special because they are something called Fainting Goats, and if you clicked on that link, or are about to watch the youtube clip below then you would know why these are the only kind of goats for me (there's something I never thought I'd say). Anyway, enjoy these goats and come visit me in about 5 years when I can guarantee that I'll have at least one of them.



To be fair though, I also faint every time I see an umbrella.

TWO: I was watching Frasier the other night on Lifetime (when you think about it, it makes sense) and I saw a commercial for an upcoming Lifetime original movie called Destination: Infestation. In case you couldn't tell from the awesome title, this movie which stars Jessalyn Gilsig (of Nip/Tuck and Heroes fame) and Antonio Sabato, Jr. (of an episode of the Outer Limits fame, who according to IMDB trivia "enjoys exercising") and it's basically just Ants on a Plane instead of Snakes on a Plane. This gem of a film premiers on 07.07.07. on Lifetime, and though I probably won't be around that night to see it, I will most definitely record it on my DVR. To my knowledge this isn't a sequel, which I guess is good because it won't taint the original Snakes in any way. Why Lifetime would wait over a year to capitalize on the hyp that Snakes failed to deliver, I don't know. All I know is that it's free and that it couldn't possibly be as bad as Talladega Nights (I didn't even come close to thinking of laughing once). In case you weren't convinced, here's IMDB description of Destination: Infestation:

While on a flight home from Columbia, the plane that Dr. Carrie Ross and her daughter are on, is attacked by bullet ants - whose sting is the most painful and deadliest on the planet. Joining forces with air marshal Ethan Hart, Dr. Ross, an entomologist, tries desperately to save the flight from disaster. In the end, their struggle brings them closer together and offers the couple hope for the future.

Sold.

THREE: The Twirl Master has returned:



I counted 12 on-screen twirls. Who knows what happened off-screen.

"I think he's doing the 'dice thing' too much."