Happy No Deal (The Baby Files, Volume 6)

Well here it is, post #100. I know that all of you out there can barely contain yourselves now that we're finally at this milestone. I'd say that I wouldn't have been able to make it this far without you, the fans, but that would be a lie. It's not like I get paid to do this, plus it's not like I have album sales or ratings to go by. So, when you think about it, this is all me, and if you happen to read it, that's fine, and if not, that's fine too. However, since I'm a nice guy, I'll give all you loyal readers out there a reward by unretiring The Baby Files, with a little help from YouTube.

In late April, Baby Lentini moved in for good with us as we prepare to sell our house and move into a new one (which is happening sometime in July). Unfortunately for me, she is always in the house and unfortunately for her (and everyone) she is starting to slip. I won't go into details, it's not anything awful or that we can't deal with, but it can be annoying, and it really shows that humans shouldn't be able to live as long as we do. Anyway, since she moved in, she has fallen in love with NBC's game show, Deal or No Deal. Now, just in case you've never seen this most annoying of all games, you still know how to play it. Everyone does. It's really not that hard to understand. Well, except for good old Baby Lentini.

Her version of how the game is played is something short of retarded. It's easy enough as it is, but she is convinced that each case has the same amount of money in it every time the game is played. I'm not too sure on her details, but apparently to her, the even number cases have all the high amount, while the odds have the low. Also, if you pick an even number in the 20s (20-26) then you have a real good chance of winning. Baby is also convinced that Howie Mandel gives the contest hints my making the sligtest of gestures that she, bt no one else has been able to notice and decipher. She has been this taken by a game show since Millionaire (which is the same thing for all of the other fans of DoND) and she really brightens up when this show comes on. Just so you know, she calls it the Gamble Show (because I guess the title they already have isn't as specific).

Anyway, I recently tried to film her expalining the game to us, with Brother trying to ask her how the game is played. In these two clips that follow, you not only get to see the hilarity that comes with living with her (like made up stories) but you also get to see the awful dowsnisde of what I have to live through everyday (like for instance how she somethimes thinks that my brother and I are girls). It's a win-win situation for everyone but my family. Please enjoy.

Here is the first video (with transcript that you don't have to send away for!) which is basically just us trying to get her thought on how you play the game on film (and just so you know, Brother does understand how to play the game):



Brother: Nana. Nana.
Baby Lentini: What? (laughs)
B: How do they play this game?
BL: Is that who? Her?
My Mom: Put your legs down, she can't hear.
John (Me): She can't tell if you're a man or not with your legs in the air.
B: How do they play this game?
BL: But you know what...
Mom: Brother wants to know how the game is played. Tell him how it is played.
JD: HOW DO YOU PLAY THE GAME?! Tell Brother how you play the game.
BL: Oh! His birthday isn't (now?)?
Mom: No, Brother doesn't understand the game.
BL: Happy No Deal!
JD: How do you play the game?
B: HOW?!?! How do you play the game?
BL: I don't know. The very first game they ever had was a girl...a young girl, 20 years old...she was getting ready to be married. She says that everybody stole their money and everything. I don't know, she just...and didn't she win the money! She won the million dollars. She was the number one, first. I have a feeling that the show people helped her on that because she said she had all that money saved and someone took it.
JD: So is Deal or No Deal fixed? Is the game fixed?

It cuts off there. Just so you know, the story about the young girl never happened. In fact, the most that somebody has won on the show I believe is $464,000. Sorry about all the screaming, but it's the only way she can hear us, and she still doesn't most of the time. The second clip consists of Baby talking about who she would take as a guest on the show if she was a contestant (we can only hope!). You should be able to hear this clearly, so there is no transcript:



So, there you go. Number 100 ladies and gents. It's been a wild (and by wild, I mean slow and rarely updated) ride. As of now, The Baby Files are going back into the vault, and may never appear again, like your favorite Disney classic movie on DVD. Thanks for reading, and I'll leave you with a list of questions (with one observation) that Baby asked my parents when they got back from their trip to Rome two weeks ago.

- Was it cold?

- Was it crowded?

- Are the buildings over there very huge?

- They say the Italians talk fast and they walk even faster.

- How's the bacon?

STAY TUNED: We'll be Talkin' Talkies tomorrow.